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Groom of the Stool
The Shit Sifter clocks in Because he never recycled and lived in sin He lives forever in a disgusting bin infernal Anyone chucks whatever in A gin bottle full of old cum A cloudbank of fouled bum rags Ten thousand stubbed out fags A dog corpse animate with maggots Meat a magpie wouldn’t eat A sanitary…
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Dragon Shit
A dragon will eat a man suit and shoes A crombie and docs jut out of his pooh Eats him whole, ears and hat, no bits Leftover, then does a great big shit With a stetson sat on top When he eats curly haired people it looks like he’s shat a mop The mound of…
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Blood Simple
Now I like a movie with thrills I sorta like Coen Brothers sometimes Watched Blood Simple and it was shite I can see how their style developed with time But it was there from the first, a certain shine A direct line to the creative divine, if you will Boring despite a short runtime Adoring…
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Pearl Jam Guy
I see you Dad’s pearl jam shirt Facebook work listed as pint university For you it never gets better Than Yellow Leadbetter You take a red setter bus to the city center Eddie Vedder on your headphones His lyrics enter you like food, like bones Into an ogre’s gullet You never caught the header Born…
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Saki Tries Relaxing
Saki at fifty in Khaki, portly and saggy Stands by sandbags, Tommy lights a fag “Put that bloody cigarette out!” The words barely leave this mouth Before fatal fireworks appear ahead Spears of lancing light improve a sniper’s sight Sniped last sunrise goodnight demise.
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Alchemisland 