Alchemisland

Heart on my sleeve, honestly 

I could see 

Piss glistening on the seat 

Busy piss listening

Outside the cubicle on my knees

I could see the feet

Orchestra, key of pee

Nery a day passes 

Without me hearing urinary tract action 

Or brown traction from the cracks of asses

While I whack one out, I cum at last 

As the last fart leaves the asshole

A big fat load blasts out

Like Spiderman’s wrist lasso 

I know it’s taboo but it’s hardly new 

I’m only human and how I do it 

Is listening to someone pooing 

Cat got the cream but your man got the scat dreams

I remark as I regard your dirty knickers from Marks and Sparks

That if I were giving marks for skidmarks 

You’d finish top of class 

Not to be too crass

But those stains aren’t from sliding across grass

Watch your brown crowning so I can become a knight

Curl one out, a shite, onto my shoulder

Don’t be shy, let’s go at it James Joyce style

Speaking of fouling 

Not Robbie, I mean jobbies 

That’s how I get my jollies 

Push with all your anal power

Into the toilet or into your trousers

Shoot with the force of a mauser 

That’ll draw a crowd, whatever the hour 

I wanna be swimming in the toilet while your turds tumble down

Even drown me 

Put them on a saucer I’ll chow down 

I love farts more than Chaucer 

How’s that now? 

Make them stinking, honking 

The worse the more bonkers 

It’ll make me, I love to taste 

The pats you make.