Alchemisland

I was out on a quest

Gone to visit mam’s cat

Received fashion inquest

One’s arm where a gat

Goes at a drive by

They drove by then smiled slyly, glided alongside me

Driver beeped his horn 

At headphone removal ears form

“Sorry boss if this is bad form.

I’ve a stag to attend

Need a uniform.”

---

Being Frank

Two travellers in a battered van, most certainly not from an antique land

Rolled down their window and greeted me

Speaker wore a dirty tracksuit, said I looked good and I thanked him 

I’m thinking bagged in the van back and sold back for ransom 

Instead, he makes inquiries in demanding fashion regarding my fashion

I keep it strictly one word, no digression, full professional

This is two nutters, not the confessional

But confess I don’t know. “It was a wedding gift from my stepfather-in-law.

Somewhere in town though.”

“What about your trousers?”

“Now them I got in H&M.”

He let a loud laugh, sort posh folk call ahems

Chest full of phlegm, lifetime of breakfast Bensons

At that drove full pelt around the bend, laughing while he went

Sent up a cry I heard around the corner 

“Go on, ya boyo!”

Man was loco but I thought it was an organised thing

Man I’m pollo

Courage up and down like a yoyo, or just down once if it’s my go.